Ohhhhh, memories and anti relationship conspiracy theories.

So, as you all should know (faithful readers, you!)

My little sister got married about 6 weeks ago or so.

I was probably about 11 or 12 when my mom & step dad (Lacey's dad) got divorced. He lives in Decatur, so we moved there when they got married. He had two nephews that, I believe, one was one year younger than me, the other a year younger than Leah.

So, needless to say, the younger ones had to play together, because the older ones were too cool.

We moved back to WF when my mom was pregnant with Lacey. I was probably 8 or 9. We would still go visit his family in Decatur. It was always fun. Ya know, the parents outside, drinking beer, the kids, running wild....doing whatever they wanted.

Anyways.....I'm getting off track of the point of this post!

I hadn't seen any of Lacey's family since I was probably 11. I did see Steven (Lacey's dad) a few times over the years. Once when Gavin was born, then he came to my Paw Paw's funeral....which I thought was really sweet. Maybe a few more times in between.

ANYWAYS......so at the wedding I was so excited to find out that Pam, Richard, and Josh were coming. I hadn't seen them in years. Josh is the cousin closest in my age, Richard & Pam are his parents.

Obviously, over the.......what? 23 years....people change. I recognized Richard & Pam right off the bat. They were adults when I'd seen them last, and they looked the same. A little older, a little thinner, but still looking good. They said they wouldn't have even recognized me, 23 years on a kid does that.

Which is why Josh had to be pointed out to me.

Double take.

What? What?

My little hellion step cousin turned into a hottie!!

Ok, so I know the wedding was like 6 weeks ago or so, and I'm just now writing about it.

But while me & my family were on vacation (visiting my sister at her new house in San Antonio), it came up.

I texted my mom & Leah and told them that I tried to get my Aunt Lisa to stop in Decatur, but she wouldn't do it!

My mom replied,"You need to NOT go there, you'll end up in trouble with that cutie pie."

Obviously, my mother & I had already had the discussion about what a hottie he grew up to be.

So I responded "haha" and she replied, "he is gorgeous tho".

True Story.

Ok, I'm going back & forth here, but after the weekend of the wedding, one of the first things I mentioned to my co workers was how good looking my "ex-step-cousin...in law?" turned out to be.

Then I was like....yeah Lacey said his wife is super sweet.

(Debbie Downer sound effect goes in here....something along the lines of,"whaaaaanwhhaaaaaa".

It was then Misti (my fellow receptionist) pointed out the fact that I am only attracted to unattainable men.

She said,"You are so anti-relationship that you only like guys that are married....or Alexander Skarsgard. "

Hey, I'm pretty sure Alexander Skarsgard is single.....is she saying I don't have a chance with him??? Rude.

Then there was the sexy Fed Ex guy that used to deliver at my job. HUGE crush on him.....yep, he was married. We nick named him FedSex. ;)

Unfortunately, he no longer works our route. Either he quit, or he said,"take me off the route where the crazy receptionist is constantly undressing me with her eyes!!"

Haha.

I laugh, but how sad would that be if it were true!

So, I told my co workers, no way! If my "ex-step-cousin...in law?" we're to get divorced, I'd totally go out with him. They were like,"really?"

Welllll, the more I thought about it, the more I realized....no, I wouldn't. He was once family.

That's weird. By blood or not, that's weird!

Then I started thinking about when we used to play and get dirty and have fun, and it reminded me of something I hadn't thought of in YEARS!

One day, we were playing in a tent in his room, and well, let's just say...we played, "show me yours, I'll show you mine". Haha.

C'mon on now! Every little kid has that other kid (opposite sex, hopefully....) that they showed their privates to!!!

He was mine. Funniest thing about it, we had been playing on walkie talkies all day.

One was in the tent with us and as we were pulling up JUST THE TOP PART of our shorts, we hear my step dad...in his deep voice......."what are y'all doing?!"

I thought we were busted! I thought one of us must have had on knee on the walkie talkie and they could hear us saying,"show me yours first".

Maybe they knew, maybe they didn't. But we didn't play that game again after that.

Although, I was tempted to see if he wanted to play the game again, at the reception. Just like old times, man! Haha.

I kid. I kid.

So anyways, point of this story is that my co workers finally brought it to my attention. I unintentionally sabotage potential relationships and I am only attracted to unattainable, unavailable guys.

But I still say if Skarsgard ever met me.... He'd totally want me.

Then I think......hmmmm, I'm actually attracted to Eric on True Blood....his confidence, his arrogance, his freaking sexiness. I'd probably be disappointed in the actual man. Because I would expect him to be just like the character he plays in True Blood.....and bite me :)

I do love being single; doing what I want, when I want, without having to answer to anyone.

So maybe I subconsciously am only attracted to guys I know I'd never have a chance with.

It's still fun to have crushes!

Besides, fantasy is always better than reality.

Now, let's be honest.....who was the first kid you swiped private part peeks with? Misti told me who hers was!

;)

I'm in the nation of procrastination

Procrastination!!

I'm moving sometime this month and I have absolutely NO motivation when it comes to packing! I packed for two days straight a couple weeks ago......then NOTHING! I feel like it should already all be packed up. How could I possibly have more to pack??

I'm looking around at these boxes that are stacked up all around the place.....but my house is still full of stuff. How does that happen??

I've thrown away so much, given away so much, have a box full of stuff for a garage sale/Faith Mission.

And a little spider just came webbing down from my ceiling....right in my face!
Don't worry, I killed it.

So, I've uploaded a million old pictures onto Facebook.....I've gone to my cousin's birthday party to paint....I've played Words with Friends, Hanging with Friends, Pocket Potions, watched True Blood (OMG! What's going on with Bill?!?!?!)

I'm off tomorrow, I HAVE to pack!! Tuesday I get Zac back from his dad's, then Wednesday we're leaving to go to San Antonio to visit my sister and check out her new house.

Ok, I'm packing tomorrow. That's all there is to it. NO Facebooking, NO Blogging, NO Words with Friends, NO Hanging with Friends, NO Pocket Potions, NO phone, NO iPad, NOTHING! I'm sticking my iPhone on the iHome, gonna blast some music and clean and pack and that's all I'm doing. That's it. That's all there is to it.





wish me luck

Awkward

Yesterday a guy came in to pick up our shred bin (containing confidential patient information). He comes every Wednesday.

When he came in yesterday I thought, he looks familiar. I think he was in my sister's wedding.

I was working, so I didn't say anything (I'm not much for small talk anyway).

But as he was leaving, he stopped and said,"Aren't you Lacey's sister?"

I said,"Yeah, I thought you looked familiar. You were in the wedding too, weren't you?"

............

"Yeah, I walked you down the aisle."

............

(random thoughts in my head)

F*ck, Stephanie, you're a horrible person!!! How could you not know that?? He probably thinks you're a total bitch. Ahhhhhh! What do I say????

...........

Me: "Oh yeah, that's right!"

him: "Well, I guess I'll be seeing ya every Wednesday."

me: "Yep. Haha. Have a good day!"

..............

Open mouth, insert foot.

My coworkers were cracking up while telling me how mean I am. They couldn't believe I didn't remember who walked me down the aisle just a couple weekends before.

I felt so terrible. But I swear, I'm HORRIBLE about remembering people I meet at short periods of times.

Faces, names.....I have no idea why, but I just can't get it until I see and talk to you on a regular basis.

I still feel bad.

awkward!!!!

I say hello....you say goodbye

Friday after work, Zac and I went Leah's to tell her & the kids good bye. Saturday morning, they left, moved to San Antonio.

She had my step dad, his son, and his son's friend loading up the U Haul. It was like, 110 degrees outside! They were pouring down sweat! I told them they looked so hot, I had to grab myself a cold beer. Haha.

Really though, I am so sad that they actually moved. They were so back and forth about going, I was secretly hoping they'd stay.

I completely understand and am still so happy for them.

They'll be so much closer to Dustin's rig. He works in the oil field and was sometimes gone months at a time. When he came home, he never knew if it'd be for a day, a week, or more. He hated to leave when it was time to head back to work. They hated to see him go.

So now, his rig is within an hour or so of their new house. Quick trips home to see him family will be more frequent. Before if he just had a day or two off, the drive back to Wichita Falls would be pointless.

So, yes...I am so happy for my sister and her family. I know Jack misses his dad like crazy while he was gone. Little boys need their daddies :)

As we were driving away, I looked over and Zac was crying. Lucia is his world, he's going to miss her so much. Last night they were able to Face time, for freaking ever it seemed like!! I was like, it's MY turn on the iPad, Zac, get off! hahaha.

In a few weeks, me & my boys, my mom & stepdad, Lacey, Chris, & Gavin, and possibly my aunt Lisa & cousin Rachel are going to visit for a week or so.
I can't wait to see them, see their new house, be off work for a week!

I've been so busy lately! I've been packing up my house because I, too, am moving. It's not the greatest neighborhood, but it's next door to my aunt and around the corner from my grandma, so that makes me feel a lot better. I'll be so glad to get back into WF and out of this country scene!! Coyotes, scorpions, tarantulas, creepster neighbor/landlord, the long drive to and from work everyday, ugh! I can't take it anymore!!
So, I'm excited!

Since Zac has gone to live with his dad, while I get my sanity back, we had to go to court today to stop child support. I swear about 40% of my life is spent in court or doctors offices.
I have ANOTHER court date the beginning of August with Gage's dad. Again, a pointless court date, where I have to clock out of work and go sit up there, knowing his dad will never pay. I mean, it's only been 6 years since I've gotten child support from him!
He's been in and out of jail so many times!
The first few times, I said, give him a chance, let him go. Now, I'm just like....keep him. He doesn't communicate with his son unless he's in jail. Once he's out, we never hear from him again.
Around Christmas I had texted his ex's daughter to see if anyone had heard from him. They're still close with Billy's family. She called around and no one had heard from him in weeks. I dislike him so much and hate what he's done to Gage, but I was praying for him. I'm still praying for him. But at that time, I was praying that he was at least alive. So, when he was put back in jail February, I was disappointed, but so happy he was ok.
He was in jail in Fort Worth for theft. But come August, he'll be moved to the jail here, since he never paid any child support from the last time we were in court.
I wrote to him and told him I was praying for him and I believe he can change. My dad and sister were both drug addicts for a long time. I know it's hard, but I also know, it can be done. I'm praying that he gets his life straight.
I told him how much he was missing out on. I mean, he hasn't seen, let alone spoken to Gage in over a year.
He had the nerve to write me and ask me to ask the judge to take it easy on him. To let him go because he has changed and Gage needs him in his life.
Dude, he's needed you in his life since you quit getting him regularly and paying child support.
He's 16 years old!! That needing a daddy phase is long gone.
Now are the days of friends, girls, cars, teenage fun. When parents are the last thing you have time for.
Needless to say, I'm going to tell them to keep him. Maybe the longer he's in jail and having to stay clean, the better it will be for him. And I will cry. Because it breaks my heart. For him and for Gage. I cry every time.
Anyways......drama, drama, drama.

BUT! Look at this beautiful picture my Zackary painted of an owl! His very first class and it is amazing!
I'm so proud of him. He has always been so artistic. I was so happy to find out about this place that has painting classes. I've been to a few myself! Fun stuff.
man, I'm old.

Anyways, yeah. There's a little update on my life up to date. :)

P.S.
Is it Friday yet?

Near death, could've been!!!!

As I lay on my bathroom floor, writhing in pain, all I could think was, 'Dear Lord, if I die, please give me just enough strength to put some clothes on first."

Yes, Monday night, I was in my bathroom for 2 hours straight. Starting on the toilet with a trash can in between my legs. Need I go into more detail? Then the stomach pains worsened, I started sweating profusely. My entire body was pouring sweat. I stripped down, feeling so weak, and laid on my bathroom floor. I couldn't move. I was seriously in and out of consciousness. Every time I tried to pull myself up I would get nauseous. I was shaky and weak and confused.

Of course, my cell phone was in the living room. I thought I was going to either die or pass out. I had to have my phone, because if I just pass out, maybe the alarm would wake me in the morning for work. But if I die, and I truly thought that was a possibility, I didn't want to be found by one of my boys, the landlord, or cops sprawled out on a bathroom floor, naked.

Eventually, (two hours later) I managed to walk/crawl/hold on to things to get to the living room and get my cell phone. I went back to my room, put on some undies and a tee, splashed my face with water and noticed.....i was pale, but my lips where white literally white. I finally made it to my bed.

My stomach still hurt, my body ached, and I was then freezing cold. I passed out.

Luckily I woke up to my alarm the next morning, feeling 60% better.

I worked all day, still with a headache, body aches, moments if nauseous ness. I went straight home and slept. And slept. And slept, until it was time for work again.

100% better.

Now I'm just trying to figure out what the hell happened.

What does it sound like?

Flu? Virus? West Nile? Food poisoning?

I have no idea.

I'm just thankful to be alive and clothed. And feeling so much better.

And tomorrow's FRIDAY!!!! Woot, woot.