heavy heart

I don't know what's wrong with me lately, but I seem to be a sentimental, emotional wreck.
I feel like I have this huge hole in my heart.
I feel like I need to make amends.
I feel like I need to forgive anyone who I think has wronged me in some way.
I feel like I need to apologize to anyone I may have wronged in some way.
I don't understand where it's all coming from, but I've been feeling this way for a while.
I've been feeling guilty for things that I've done, even years ago.
I want to reach out to people I've passed without a thought of what's going on in their lives, too caught up in my own to notice.
I hate that I often don't give people a chance.
For some reason I've had an urge to apologize.
To my ex-husband for leaving the way I did.
I was young and stupid
Would I ever go back to him? No, I know leaving was right. I just didn't do it the right way.
I'm thankful that he has found someone to be with, who is good to him and Zac.
I've been wanting to apologize to my friend who was going through a divorce last year, who needed a friend, but I blew him off. I was too caught up in my own life to take the time to just be there for him.
I want to forgive Gage's dad for the past 5 years. I've been praying for that. I've also been praying that he will forgive himself and see that a change needs to be made.
Not only for our son, but for himself.
I feel like somewhere along the way, my heart has gone hard.
I've taken too many things for granted.
I've taken too many things personal and closed myself off to so many people.
I feel like I haven't been the friend or person that I should be. It breaks my heart.
As hurtful as these emotions are feeling, I hope they don't go away. They make me want to change, I want to be a better person.