Long time, No talk....Part 2

So, when I ended my last blog entry, I said that I had a cry fest last night. Man, it was bad. I cried from about 6:00 until....well...off and on til bedtime. Then when I woke up...then this morning I was fighting the tears, since I had to work with the patients.
All I have to say is,"Thank God for my sister, Leah." I have no idea what I'd do without her. She is not only my sister, but my best friend, and also...my therapist! Me and my boys therapist, apparently. haha.
So, on to the reasoning for my crying spell.
Everyone knows....well, if you know me or read my blog...that I have a CRAZY 7 year old son. I love him more than life itself. Gage and Zac are my world. But as much as I love Zac the Maniac, I have admit that he is sometimes hard to handle. Especially being a single mom with two boys. It's hard sometimes. I've always known that Zac was a little different.
I was talking to a guy I used to work with at the state hospital. Just talking about the weird little things that Zac does.
Well, he and my sister think he may be mildly autistic.
Now when I think about autistic kids, I think about the hard core autistic kids that I worked with at the state hospital. Granted he does do some of the things they did, but just not so extreme.
Zac is extremely smart. He's able to communicate and do things on his own. So, him being autistic never crossed my mind. I thought...ADD or ADHD...or something along those lines.
Anyways, about a month ago, he started twisting his wrist. Like you would if you hurt your wrist. But he does it all the time. Which the RN at the state hospital I was talking to about Zac, said that he was developing OCD behaviors, which is common with autistic children.
I've had this on my mind a lot lately. And I've been wanting to get him an appointment with a specialist, so we can find out for sure what's going on.
Yesterday after me and Zac picked up Gage from baseball practice, we went to get Subway. We went home, sat down at the dinner table, and starting eating. Zac was doing is wrist again and he looked at me and said,"Mom, I have a problem." I was like..."Oh yeah, what's that?"
He said,"I keep doing my wrist like this and I don't know why. I can't stop."
It broke my heart into a million pieces.
Yeah, I've noticed the problem, but when my 7 year old son comes to me, realizing that he's different and he's doing something that is beyond his control......Broke.My.Heart.
So, I do what I always do and I called my sister. She drove right out and had a talk with Zac. Talking about stuff like that is always so easy for her. It's hard for me, just because communication has always been my downfall. And I just cry so easily.
So, thank God for Leah. She went to his room and talked to him about it for about 30 minutes. I was crying the whole time. When they came out of the room I heard him say,"Thank you for talking to me, Leah" She said,"Anytime, buddy. Anytime you feel like you need to talk, you can talk to me." broke.my.heart.
Long story...less long, she talked to him about his doctors appointment and we're going to figure out something to help him. That there's nothing wrong with him, everyone has something that is different and this is his thing. And we're going to do everything we can to help him.
breaks.my.heart.
I love that little guy more than anything. And I just can't stand that this is something that he's obviously been thinking about and worrying about.

Anyways, sorry this was so long. But this is what caused my breakdown last night.
Hopefully when I take him to the specialist we can get something done for my little baby. :)